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Submitted: February 8, 2012
Image Size: 7.1 MB
Resolution: 3400×5032

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What Do I Have To Be ?by *tamasan

deviantART Related / deviantID

A really bizarre self portrait I finished several months ago. The title comes from one of my songs. I drew inspiration from several iconic portraits and famous paintings. This image is largely based on Jungian ideas. It doesn't totally look like me, but it isn't a picture of my face, it is supposed to be a picture of my soul. The eyes are cheetah eyes, for instance. Not to say that I have a cheetah soul or that I am therian, but my love of anthropomorphism is an important part of who I am. I chose cheetahs because their fun-loving disposition reflects how I would like to be, but their tears remind me of who I am. I want to learn to reconcile my somber reverence with my wish to embody outgoing jubilation.

Actually, I have a beard now, so this is somewhat outdated. Besides that, at the time, I meant the tears to be reminiscent of the crying Madonna statues. It was only after that I learned of Zalgo and spotted the black tears on a Lady Gaga album. I guess that fits the ideas of the picture well anyway. Why specifically are the tears black? Have you ever looked closely at a cheetah's face?

See if you can guess which images influenced this if you want.

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I will probably do continual little touch-ups of this over time. I really like this piece, but I keep noticing little problems with it that need to be fixed.

*Engrishman Sep 14, 2012

Nice drawing! I like the surreal proportions of this and the smoothness of the shading.

*tamasan Sep 16, 2012

Thanks! Also kudos for resisting the urge to say "first".

*Engrishman Sep 16, 2012

You're welcome! And I never really understood why some Deviants do that, to be honest.

*tamasan Sep 17, 2012

I find it incredibly ironic how unoriginal it has become to use the phrase first. A wise man once said, the first shall be last and the last shall be first. I wonder if that applies. lol

Anyhoodlez, thanks for the input and keep up the great work. Your stuff is awesome!

*Engrishman Sep 17, 2012

Hmmm...possibly? XD

And thanks very much <3

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